5- COVID19 after 17 weeks of self-quarantine

It's been 14 weeks since my last post during COVID19 pandemic. I've learned that regular Zoom time with people I care for has been very helpful and mood-elevating. But that sitting outdoors in lawn chairs with 10 or fewer people 6 feet part wearing masks is even better!

Of the holidays that have passed -- Easter, Mother's Day, Memorial Day, Father's Day, and Independence Day -- there's been some improvement. I got to see members of my family outdoors in the yard on Memorial Day and ate cookout food with them indoors by July 4th. I drove through a "reverse parade" in Montgomery where the floats were stationary throughout the Sycamore High School parking lot and we drove past them alone in our air conditioned cars, waving.  I went to two (2) different fireworks shows in my car, sat outdoors 6 ft from others in my mask at Fairfield and Loveland. Instead of doing Final Friday at the Pendleton Art Center, I participated in the National Arts Drive where people drove in their cars to see artists like me exhibit in their driveways and front yards.

Some things that are better than before COVID:

1. Seeing at least some members of my family every Sunday night on Zoom
2. Engaging in conversation with people during outdoor walks -- saying hello to neighbors and becoming friendlier with them.
3. Spending more time outdoors walking
4. Working from home, because when everyone is doing it, they participate better in remote meetings and are more creative about how to get things done without actually being in the office together
5. Discovering new eating options like Out of Thyme frozen meals and delivery services like Hungry Root

Some things that remain challenging for me:

1. Feeling mentally and emotionally down, especially when people I know are sick or struggling. My sister-in-law's dad not being able to have the 90th birthday party he'd planned. Weddings postponed or pared down. Losing dear friends to death without being able to attend funeral services for them.
2. Not gathering in person as much with friends
3. Wearing a mask. Not hugging or shaking hands.
4. Not being able to rehearse or sing with my two choirs
5. Not feeling like painting or creating artwork
6. Not shopping in stores
7. Not getting my hair done

Still, I am fortunate and remain very grateful that no one close to me has died from this virus and I sure hope it stays that way! My first known exposure to someone who has tested positive was 13 days ago, in a parking lot, 6 ft apart, wearing masks. She drove to Michigan the next day and just got test results. Hasn't been too sick; not hospitalized. I'm now trying to get into the habit of taking my temperature before I go out to be around other people, or at least every morning. Haven't been tested yet, either antibody or the live test. Sad that Hamilton County, where I live, is Red for community spread. But that's not stopping me from picking my brother up at the airport tonight or having him stay here while on a business trip from Charlotte NC.

4 - COVID19 What's really "essential?"

My brother and co-workers have told me Home Depot's been packed with people stocking up on DIY project stuff to do around the house while they're Stay At Home.

Based on some guidelines I read, and my own thoughts, here's what I need to feel comfortable not leaving the house:

1. Bible
2. iPhone and its chargers for home and car, so I can talk to the people I love and care about
3. Gasoline in the car
4. Bottled water and enough food to last several weeks
5. Flashlight and candles in case power goes out
6. PC to WFH (and the afore-mentioned phone to MFA to the network)

Today a lady on NextDoor appealed to the community on behalf of her children who are working in stores and waiting on people who are buying wine racks and things she doesn't think are "essential" and therefore putting her kids at risk of community spread of COVID19. When I read what she wrote, I decided I'd be more thoughtful about what I go out to a store to buy, at least for the next few weeks.

3-COVID19 The Most Important Thing Today

Other than going outdoors to get a little fresh air (and staying at least 6' away from the people I'm with while outside), the most important thing I can do for the world today is

STAY HOME!

I might be a carrier.

And I posted this to my FaceBook and LinkedIn accounts today to ask others to please do the same.

"Please do as our governor has asked and only go out for essential items. We all have to act like we are potential carriers of the virus! If you listen to Governor DeWine and Dr. Amy Acton in their daily briefings, or look at the Johns Hopkins web site each day, the news is sobering. To a certain extent, we can all continue to influence the outcome of this pandemic and help protect those who have no choice but to work, especially first responders and medical personnel. Thank you for staying home!"

I wish I had done it sooner than Mar 16 -- I should have! (especially after being in NYC in Feb)
And I was stupid to have gone to the office Mar 9-13 when I could have worked from home instead.

2- COVID19 Anticipatory Grief

I liked Tim McGraw even before I read this quote by him...

"Health might start in the body, but it extends way beyond the physical -- it's about your connections to the world and people around you and your ability to serve and give."

I'm so lucky to still have the ability to WFH Mon thru Fri and to connect with those I love on outdoor walks and via Zoom and FaceTime. But when someone told me how sad she'd been feeling and that her rabbi described it at "anticipatory grief," I recognized the heaviness in my chest and heart that leaves me with so little energy to perform the many tasks I could be doing here at home with all this free time, even painting. It's a form of depression that has me doing little but laying around in bed or on the couch watching TV or escaping into reading novels.

Humor helps and this is an example of what's being shared via email and social media.

But it's probably not healthy to pretend that I don't feel sad, in spite of all life's blessings today, as I anticipate a world in which all of us is likely to lose at least one dear one to this virus or maybe depart this life ourselves as a result of it.

Thankfully, our church - Sycamore Presbyterian - has been a great leader, solace, and comfort during this time, with virtual streaming and recorded worship services, a daily blog from the staff, and suggestions for safely helping others. The current circumstances don't prevent me from praying or reading the Bible. And I am a person who has always enjoyed solitary pursuits like painting, reading, listening to music, and watching TV. Although I will say it's different when those things are my choice and not "courses of last resort," which enables me to feel what elderly folks might when forced into assisted living or senior care rather than choosing it for themselves.

1- COVID19 Stay At Home

I confess that I probably would have been one of those people who "pooh-poohed" social distancing and was in denial had I not been working in the office at Ohio National. I started Feb 24 and within my first 2 weeks noticed the leadership being proactive about COVID19, allowing people the option to work from home (WFH) and putting hand soap dispensers near frequently-touched surfaces like the elevator buttons. We were all asked to ensure our ability to WFH and let our bosses know we were ready. But I still went into the office because it was close to home and I liked the social aspect of getting to know all my new colleagues F2F.

Noticed our Governor, Mike DeWine, and his chief health officer Dr. Amy Action giving daily briefings on TV at 2p, so was ready for ONFS to order us to WFH and for the Ohio primary election on St. Patrick's Day 3/17 to be postponed. Someone told me to check the Johns Hopkins web site daily for COVID19 info. It's starting to sink in what a catastrophe is coming and how "social distancing" cannot stop it but can definitely lessen the number of people who will die from the virus.

But selfishly, I continued to "go out" for dinner at a friend's house when the Fish Fry we'd planned to attend got cancelled. And to bowling league with my team, 8 Balls and 2 Babes, which I knew was down a member on Fri Mar 13. That was the last social event I now expect to attend until July! And I'm now sorry and embarrassed I went to work and bowling this week, because I was in NYC just a few weeks ago and could be a carrier. Remember Mack Wilberg instructing us never to touch our faces once on the risers in Carnegie Hall and realizing then how often I do that: a hard habit to break.

On Mon Mar 16, we were told we must WFH. Knowing how lonely and isolated I feel when WFH, I remembered using Zoom for video conferences while I worked for Quandary Consulting and looked to see if I could set up a personal "free" account. Sure enough, I could; hallelujah! Set up weekly Tues night calls for the golf group, Thurs night calls for Book Babes, and Sun night calls for the family.  Started using FaceTime more when calling people. It's amazing how much it helps to see the faces of those I care about on a regular basis! Thank you, Zoom and Apple (for FaceTime).

Part 11 Carnegie Hall NYC last day 9/11 Ground Zero Memorial and Museum

The subway was right near our hotel, so after packing and storing our luggage, we rode it down to City Hall. Today as I am writing this journal during COVID19 quarantine, I wonder who is riding the subway. But on Tues Feb 18 it was jam-packed! And weird because almost everyone was wearing noise-canceling earbuds and looking at their screens, so no one looked at or talked to each other (except us).

When we got out at City Hall, we walked toward a very old church with an adjacent cemetery and then saw this weird-looking building that turned out to be "The Oculus." We went so far indoors that we had to come back up to street level. There's The Oculus in the background...

Here are Lora and Karyn standing on the plaza near the entrance to the 9/11 Museum. The Memorial was to their right -- holes in the ground where the twin towers used to be with waterfalls flowing into them and the names of victims who perished carved around the perimeter. Very sobering!

And then to our left, the new World Trade Center towering 1,776 ft. taller than the buildings that were knocked down, with an Observation Deck on top where you could see the rivers, Statue of Liberty, etc. just like the one I used to love to go to at Windows on the World before September 11.

It is hard to do justice to this place in words. Since our time was limited, friends had told us not to linger very long at anything until we got to the revolving doors of the "historical exhibit" that walked you through re-experiencing that day from beginning to end. But even though we didn't stay long, a couple of things made a lasting impression on me.

One was where the remains are interred behind a beautiful wall of blue watercolor paintings, all in different hues. Each one was painted by someone as a memory of the color of the sky that day. I've always wondered whether each of us sees "blue" the same way. It was beautiful to see all the different blue papers covering that wall that were each unique but still all "blue."

I had forgotten what a marvel the construction of the Twin Towers was at the time they were built. Conceived when we went to the Moon in the late sixties, seeing everything about their original construction gave new perspective to the twisted wreckage displayed. The years of thought, creativity and effort that went into building something that was knocked down in a few hours.

The memorial to those who perished was unforgettable. Photos of each person. A running loop of audio from friends and relatives describing each individual. Mementos of who they were as people: one guy's ski goggles, a woman's knitting.

It hasn't been 20 years yet and I realized how much I've forgotten and how complacent I've become when walking through the historical exhibit. It was interesting experiencing the event from others' viewpoints: from people on the planes to those in the 2nd tower before it was hit to the first responders. I couldn't listen to the voice mail and answering machine messages that had been left for loved ones who didn't live to hear them. And Karyn was stunned by a video wall of dust and debris rushing down the street towards her that I must have missed.

There was much more to see and experience than we had time for in three hours. But I don't think I could have taken more than that in the same day. I would go back if I have the opportunity. It was striking how many people were there that day who wouldn't have been alive when it happened. For me, it would give someone a good sense of what that day was like if you had been.

And then we got back to our hotel to catch the bus and our bellman shared that 2 firemen in NYC passed away while we were there of complications from having responded to the attack that day.

The trip to New York to perform at Carnegie Hall for the Director of the Tabernacle Choir in a patriotic concert on Presidents' Day evening was everything I hoped and dreamed it would be, and more. Especially as today I sit at home, self-quarantined, hoping to minimize the effects of the COVID19 virus on our community, state and country.

We were very lucky and blessed to have had this experience.

Part 10 Carnegie Hall NYC The Performance and After-Party

After leaving the NBC Studio Tour about 5:30p, we went back to the hotel to rest. Singers weren't to arrive at the Stage Door of Carnegie Hall until 8:15p, but Margie had a ticket to go watch the whole concert so she left about 6:30p

We got cleaned up and headed back to the 5th floor rehearsal hall to wait to be called to the stage. There was a monitor in the room but we really couldn't see or hear what was going on on-stage that well. Butterflies, but great ones! I wondered how full the hall would actually be? I'd been told it might be mostly friends and families of the performers.

But on Presidents' Day for a concert titled "Who Are the Brave?" Carnegie Hall was full except for the top balcony. Wow! New Yorkers are patriotic.What an experience! Seems like it was happening and over in a minute.

Here's a review of the concert.

I didn't even realize we'd gotten a standing ovation after singing "My Country Tis of Thee" because I was so busy looking at Dr. Wilberg's smile and thumbs up to the choir and orchestra.

Grabbed our coats and headed back to the hotel to get purses and wallets and head down the block to Rosie O'Grady's for a 2-hour "after-party" in an upstairs room that reminded me of a wedding reception or the 2nd floor of Antoine's in New Orleans.  After another full day and 15,000+ steps I went back to the hotel and slept soundly, anticipating our visit to Ground Zero before the bus picks us up tomorrow afternoon to head back to the airport.

Part 9 Carnegie Hall NYC Monday Presidents' Day

Today is the day! Here we are in front of the poster advertising our concert on Carnegie Hall. There is another 250-singer choir starting the show singing the music of Joseph Martin and they can't have that many people backstage, so our dress rehearsal today will practice us entering the hall halfway through the show tonight. Margie has a ticket, so she'll get to see it all; we won't. (And still haven't, although they've promised to send our Director 1 CD of it.)

Since we don't have to rehearse until 1p, we went and ate another big brunch at the Red Eye Grill and then headed off to walk in Central Park. We were lucky that the weather was so conducive to walking outdoors and the hotel was so close to everything that we could get everywhere we wanted to go on foot except Ground Zero (subway) and back to the airport (bus).

Once long ago I had a delightful Sunday brunch at the Palm Court of the Plaza Hotel, so I wanted to find it. And a lot of SCS friends had told us to look for the black door next to the Plaza that led to the food courts underneath the hotel. Apparently it was like those in Harrod's in London with great things to eat. We found the black door and the food courts easier than the way into the Plaza's lobby but we finally made it to see the Palm Court and some spectacular floral arrangements.

Dress rehearsal began by entering through the stage door, which was right next door to The Russian Tea Room, where we planned to eat after practice. We walked up steps to a 5th floor rehearsal room where we got instructions about getting down to the Carnegie Hall stage.

It happened so suddenly it kind of took me by surprise ... when they called us, we walked down five flights of steps to a stage door and there we were! Margie got to take the tour of Carnegie Hall were they explained how all curved surfaces contributed to the excellent acoustics and sound quality.

Some of our non-singing friends got to sit way in the back and listen to our first rehearsal with the orchestra. I've sung with orchestras before but never one that good! When they played Shenandoah I forgot to sing and even the men shed a tear along with us women.

Something I'l remember about Mack Wilberg: you're never so good that you can't use help. He had people sitting in the audience who gave him notes after every piece of music about what went well and what could be improved. Again, the practice went so fast and then we had to get off the stage.

On to the Russian Tea Room for food before walking to "30 Rock" for our tour of NBC Studios.

Part 8 Carnegie Hall NYC Broadway show Come From Away

My friend Laurie gave me the CD of the Come From Away soundtrack and I had listened to it so many times before we came to the theatre Sunday night that I thought I knew the story. But wow, what a performance! I wondered if the audience energized the cast in an unusual way or if they (and the instrumentalists) are always that energetic. Incredible!! Everyone left the theatre on a high and several dozen others from our choir were there so we had fun talking about it.

The show was awesome and a much different perspective of 9/11 than we got visiting Ground Zero and the Memorial Museum a few days later. Karyn wanted to go to Gander Newfoundland even after we found out how hard it was to get there.

I wanted to go after I read this article Lora sent us about one of the cast members who went and visited all the real people who were characters in the show.

Times Square at night after the theatre was a revelation -- it was as bright as day and once again packed with families visiting NYC for Presidents' Day weekend. We were hungry and thought we'd find a restaurant since we hadn't been able to make a reservation. It was harder than we thought but finally saw a bunch of people coming out of this one and the Italian food was great, once again.

We were the only people there and they stayed open for us; yay! Tomorrow is the big day.

On our walk back to the hotel, we saw a whole bunch of choral singers going into Rosie O'Grady's for their "after show party" like we are supposed to have tomorrow night. We looked up online and found the Sunday night Carnegie Hall concert of John Rutter's music -- that must have been who they were. Anyway, it added to our anticipation. Plus we were more confident about where to go after our concert the next day.

Part 7 - Carnegie Hall NYC Sun 8a rehearsal with Mack Wilberg

There was a deli on the corner right next to the Park Central Hotel where almost all of us went to grab a quick breakfast before rehearsal on Sunday morning. Felt like a real New Yorker!

It seemed apparent from the way Dr. Wilberg was dressed that he had already been, or was going to, worship -- something that I had not made time for -- and that impressed me. Especially since he had followed up our rehearsal Sat with practicing with the orchestra for Monday night's concert. Again, musicians I think he met for the first time and never conducted before.

More good practice. The simplest things were the most difficult. Did you ever sing a cappella and then have the music come in afterwards on a different pitch? I think this was the first time I've ever sung a cappella and it came in on the same pitch (we worked hard on that!) Learning some things that should help me in the future.

I realized that I 'oversing" most of the time. And why? The great thing about being in a choir is that I don't have to -- there are plenty of voices. If a note was too high for me, it was fine to just drop out and not sing it -- let those sopranos who can easily hit those high notes do it.

We got finished a little early (12:30p) and I went off to meet my friend from Findlay OH for a wonderful lunch and afternoon at the Museum of Modern Art (MOMA). Didn't want to wear myself out too much because our Broadway show -- Come From Away -- started at 7p.

Part 6 - Carnegie Hall NYC Italian dinner at Trattoria dell Arte

Fortunately some friends from the choir asked us to join them down the street at an Italian restaurant for dinner. 

Unlike others in this choir who had traveled together to Europe with Mrs. Gartner before, I had never traveled with a big group. This night with about 30 of us at the dinner table exemplified how much fun it was to share the NYC experience with a bunch of friends.

Despite being tired, we really enjoyed comparing notes with others on what they thought of our first rehearsal with Dr. Wilberg and what all they'd done since coming to NYC. The last time I was in Manhattan, I'm pretty sure there weren't 41 shows open on Broadway. Some of our fellow singers went to a different one every night.

See our waiter in the background of this photo -- we thought he looked like an "Italian Bill Murray" and he was so good to us that we were delighted to see him again a few days later when he served us at The Russian Tea Room. Made us realize Manhattan can be kind of small town too.

Enjoyed a great meal and went back to the hotel and slept soundly -- good beds and soundproof walls at the Park Central Hotel.

Part 5: Carnegie Hall NYC our 1st rehearsal with the Director of the Tabernacle Choir

The chance to sing for Mack Wilberg, Director of the Tabernacle Choir and Orchestra, is one of the reasons I wanted to come on this trip - what an opportunity of a lifetime! Here is Dr. Wilberg with Linda Gartner, who directs us Sycamore Community Singers (SCS) in Cincinnati.

Sometimes when you look forward to something for so long, you can't help but be disappointed. I have to say that meeting and singing for Mack Wilberg was the opposite of that -- what a wonderful man!  Some of the sopranos in my section had speculated that he wouldn't even come in and lead the two 5-hr rehearsals on Sat and Sun but would have an assistant do that and then just fly in Monday for the dress rehearsal and concert at Carnegie Hall. But that is not what happened

DCINY was very well organized with these rehearsals: I got a badge at the breakfast meeting with my row and position number on it. Based on my height and voice part, it turns out that was my position on the risers onstage for the concert. And in the ballroom for rehearsals. We moved around a little bit making adjustments, so I ended up 2 positions different in the same row and just had to remember my new number and who I was sitting/standing next to.

I looked up front and thought the man standing there looked an awful lot like Mack Wilberg's photo printed on the music and sure enough: it was the great man himself! But so humble. So kind. And so positive. Think about this from his perspective -- he is presenting a concert featuring 6 of his arrangements at Carnegie Hall on Monday night.

He meets his 250 volunteer amateur singers on Saturday afternoon for the first time -- we are from Arizona, Minnesota, Cincinnati, and 75 are high school students from Iowa and Oregon. He has Sat and Sun to get us ready to dress rehearse with the orchestra on Mon at 12:30p

 The old joke is "How do you get to Carnegie Hall? ... Practice, practice, practice!" Frankly, I was pretty tired of practicing this music by the time we got to the ballroom on Saturday. (We started back in July).

But I can't believe how much Dr. Wilberg taught us in 5 hours! We sounded so much better when we left at 5p than when we started. And he was so complimentary and positive. He said it was good that we all knew the notes and had practiced so much because now we could focus on "making music." I knew what he meant -- when I start singing I'm reading the notes on the page but once I know them, I can actually "sing" from the heart.

AND, do what he said was most important, which was to "Listen louder than you sing!"

These hours in rehearsal just flew by but when we were finished at 5p, boy was I tired! And I knew we'd be back to practice again at 8:15a Sunday morning, so didn't want to do too much on Saturday night.

Part 4 Carnegie Hall NYC Sat am before first 5-hr rehearsal

We first saw the Redeye Grill (home of the dancing shrimp) from our Golden Touch bus: it was literally right across the street from our hotel and from Carnegie Hall. At 8a on Saturday morning, all 90+ of us got the best breakfast buffet of our lives there while our Director debriefed us on what would happen during the rest of our time in NYC.

Not only was the food good but I thought the restaurant had the ambiance of a Parisian cafe and lots of large tables to enjoy socializing with others in the group. The hot buffet had frittatas, egg sandwiches, eggs benedict, Belgian waffles, delicious corn pancakes, cheesy scrambled eggs, bacon, and house-made chicken sausage. Plus they had all kinds of pastries. Bagels cream cheese and lox. Yogurt parfaits and smoothies. An oatmeal bar. We fueled up in preparation for 5 hours of practice.

 Got done eating about 9a so we decided to walk from our hotel down to Times Square. Today was our coldest day in NY (17 degrees) and I was glad for my hat, scarf and gloves. Found the theatre for our Broadway show on Sunday night -- Come From Away.

I liked getting a closer view of the New Year's Eve ball changing colors with 2020 underneath it. All the video was dizzying to me: certainly a lot different than the last time I was in NYC. Here's a photo I took of Lora and Karyn at the George M. Cohan statue on Broadway. Cold and clear day and lots of families with children in Times Square and obviously visiting NYC for the 3-day Presidents' Day weekend, so there's a "buzz" even beyond what's probably normal for Manhattan on a regular weekend. Kind of exciting...

At Carnegie Hall, we had trouble finding the gift shop and I got nervous wandering around on the 2nd floor listening to what we later learned was a music competition (figured out we were outside all the box entrances on that floor) until we finally found this museum area with all the memorabilia, which was very interesting and right near the gift shop.

Actually the gift shop was quite small and crowded so I preferred wandering around the displays in this area because it was roomier.

I didn't realize how Isaac Stern almost single-handedly saved Carnegie Hall from the wrecking ball. So glad he did! If you are ever offered the chance to perform there, I recommend doing it; you won't be sorry. Like my childhood friend said "It's every musician's dream"

We hadn't been on the stage yet when I was learning about all the people who had performed there, from Judy Garland to the Beatles. Here are Benny Goodman's clarinet, Gene Krupa's drumsticks, Lionel Hampton's mallets and Leonard Bernstein's conducting baton.

The gift shop was small but chock a block full of great souvenirs!

Time to head back to our hotel's ballroom for our first rehearsal with Mack Wilberg and the other choirs from Iowa, Minnesota, Oregon, and Arizona.